Ahh yes, another Thursday and a day that I should be working on papers but I choose to procrastinate until later in the afternoon.  Taking time out for a little rant has never hurt anyone in the long run as long as deadlines are met, right??  Even if it’s not right, that’s the way it is today….

There are things that I am just OVER hearing about, so much so that although I have an opinion, I don’t engage in multiple discussions about them on social networks because beating a dead horse usually ends up in frustration..so, here is my list of things that I wish people could STFU about and move on…….(in no particular order, just as they come to mind)

1.  My blogs – There are some people who must be a glutton for punishment.  They make snarky comments and remarks but never really “bring it” and say what they mean.  As far as my blog and content is concerned, I think it is all pretty self explanatory.  One can choose to agree or disagree with the post, follow or not follow the blog.  To me, following a blog to take an opportunistic moment to say something random and passive aggressive makes no damned sense.  If what I am doing is that serious to someone, I may suggest some professional help because that sh!t is not healthy.

2.  Whitney Houston – Look, I think the tragic death of anyone is just that, tragic.  Whitney was a songbird of whom I was never a huge fan but I will give credit where credit is due, she had a beautiful voice, it was just not one that caught my ear.  As my mom used to say “everythang ain’t for everybody”.  Every day, some media outlet is further trying to reduce the Whitney thing to its lowest common denominator.  Look, she’s gone, it’s sad, no illegal drugs were found, he death was either accidental or it wasn’t and ultimately, she was the only one responsible for her own demise.  Relax……let it go……….she’s gone and running a new story about her every day is not going to change that.

3.  Chris Brown, with or without Rihanna – This whole argument about what Chris Brown should be allowed or not allowed to do professionally because of his domestic violence issues has been blown way out of proportion.  He’s a douche bag, it is what it is but it’s time to move forward.  I do not recall anyone repeatedly trying to professionally bury people like Sean Penn, Charlie Sheen, David Hasselhoff,  Nicholas Cage, Vanilla Ice, Tommy Lee, Terrance Howard, Wesley Snipes or any of the other poorly behaving celebrity perpetrators of domestic violence.  Either we throw them all under the bus professionally or let them do their job and let the courts handle them.  There is no reason to keep the tape rolling.  Now, as far as he and Rihanna are concerned, who cares?  They are grown, let them screw each other’s heads off if they want, this nonsense of analyzing their recent work together is a waste of time.  So much of a waste of time that I’ve spent all that I am going to spend on it……..see how that works?

4.  Forgetting that some things are human issues and not “left” or “right” issues – Issues such as health care reform, entitlement programs, reproductive heath and so on are “hot button” political topics, they always are, especially during an election year.  Although how those issues are managed may be a “left” or “right” issue, I think that the core idea that is forgotten is that those issues pertain to how we are going too manage and treat sick people, and how are we going to empower those who have been displaced by the economic downturn to once again be able to support themselves and their families under their own power.  I am not into handouts or paying people to do nothing, I am, in favor of helping to create a climate where people can crawl out of a hole, help themselves and return to being self sufficient.  To me, those issues are not just about politics, they are about human lives and human survival.  Maybe if they were viewed as such, some compromises could be made.  I am OVER people who make EVERY damned thing a left or right issue, hell it’s not the fault of the “left” or the “right” if the weather is bad……..oh wait, that’s a “global warming” issue…*Rolls Eyes*.

5.  I have a dream!!!  I have a dream!!!  I have a dream that one day, I will live in a nation where my President will not be judged based on the color of his/her skin but the content of his/her character!!!  That dream is very much a reality for me, I will NOT vote for a candidate for any office just because they’re black, white, blue, green or purple.  I am an issues based person and that is what matters to me.  I think that people who support a politician based on the color of his/her skin are just as shallow as those who refuse to support a candidate based on the same reasons.  If I have to choose between two buses, one going straight to hell driven by a black driver and one going where I am trying to go, driven by an Asian driver……guess what, I’m not going to take the chance that I might reach my destination by using hell as the scenic route.  I’m going with the driver that is going my way.

6.  People who are impressed because Obama is capable of doing stereotypical “black thangs” – There are some groups of people who really believe that black folks are born to sing, dance and entertain the masses, kind of the way that jesters used to.  I come unglued when I hear people go on and on about Obama singing at some event but not being outraged that some of his policies are leaving gaping holes in the Bill of Rights.  It is NOT okay that he passes a bill that allows U.S. citizens to be arrested and held indefinitely without charges or gives INTERPOL the right to violate our entire Bill of Rights as long as he can SING about it!  C’mon!!!  I guess I should be glad that he’s shown that he can’t dance, I am not sure my nerves could handle it.

7.  People who try to convert the internet by way of preaching gospel on status updates, all day, every day……..that annoys me so much that I just delete them.  I’m a spiritual person and I am a firm believer that if one’s higher power is going to reach out to people, he’s not going to need twitter, facebook, email or anything like that to do it.  My deity has much stronger networking skills than that….lol.

8.  Definition of “Natural Born Citizen” – Some people think this is a new issue but it’s not, it’s been one since the 1800′s.  Maybe I’m over simplifying this but here is the way I see it.  One was considered to be a natural born citizen if born of two american citizens prior to the 14th amendment.  The ratification of the 14th amendment should supersede anything before it as does an addendum to any contract.  If the goal is to repeal the 14th amendment, then I think people need to just come out and say it, why try to enforce antiquated rulings because the wording of the 14th amendment is not working for them?  Now, one has to be careful in handling the 14th amendment since it is also the one that gives citizens the protection of due process under the law.   Personally, I think we should have an established congressional vetting system with a list of documentation that must be disclosed for people to run for president.  I think that would eliminate politicians from using executive orders to have their records sealed and so on.  If one wants to lead a nation, do so with their hand open, it’s about transparency, remember?

I was going on to number 9, but my producer says that I’m out of time….lol!!!!  Have a great day!

Some people define themselves based on their current relationships.  Although I hear this a lot more about women than men, there are men who do it too.  I have an ex…*Smh*, (the first issue is that I have to admit to dating this guys about 5 or so years ago)…..anyway, he’s an ex, that keeps reinventing himself, he just never reinvents himself into anything anyone can actually use.

My ex is Sicilian, yes, it matters and you will see why in a little bit.  Moving on, there is a feature on one of my social networking sites that lets me know when people remove me from their list.  As a habit, when people’s name show up there, I look to see if I was actually removed or if they just turned their account off temporarily.  I don’t freak out about either, but I do suffer from normal human curiosity.  When I saw “Sam Sausagehead’s” name show up, I did my normal checking and yup, he’d deleted me.  Apparently I did not fit into his new life philosophy which is:

“13 WORDS LIVE BY(((((WE MUST SECURE THE EXISTENCE OF OUR RACE AND FUTURE OF ARE WHITE CHILDREN))))))”

That is a direct quote…. I wanted to make sure I used a direct quote so that NOTHING gets lost in translation.

Let’s begin with the obvious….his 13 words to live by, took him 14 words to quote.

Are vs. Our .. was not a typo, that’s his thing..funny how he spells “existence” correctly, he must have had help with that one, and decided to try “our” on his own and failed.

Before I finish breaking down the REST of his stupidity, I don’t advocate bigotry or racism, I see no use for it, however, everyone has the right to believe what they wish, as long as their right does not infringe on the rights of others.

Now, here are some of the fine points of his foolishness of which I am sure he is unaware:

Remember I said he was Sicilian?  Well, the island of Sicily is where many African’s went to avoid the slave trade, meaning, many Sicilians are mixed with the blood of African’s.  Maybe I’m wrong but I am thinking that the separatists groups are allowing in people of African descent, if they are, the rules have changed greatly.

Next, it is my understanding (apparently not his) that one is not embraced by separatist groups if one has been involved in “race mixing” or having been intimately involved with someone outside of their race.

What is so bad about all of this, is when I mentioned his “reinvention”, I didn’t even use his name, he’s just so random that my friends knew EXACTLY who I was referring to and this is some of what THEY had to say about the “new him”:

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA…”ARE WHITE CHILDREN” ??!”

“And so, I MUST ask this Stang: what EXACTLY did this “entry-level fucktard” say to convince YOU to let him “hit it” ?? I’m just curious because at one time, this was YOUR “man”, right ??  (can’t stop laughin’)”

“I counted for 14 words, but hey what I do I know, I have a diploma :-/  “

“Well DAYUUUMMMM…you’re fuckin’ up the program, Stang !! It’s ‘once you go black, you never go BACK”, not “once you go black, you’re gonna’ say FUCK THAT’ !! lol”

“‎Stang, you BET not be talking about who I think you were because if so, I don’t have the patience or the “stash” for this phuckery on my day off!!!!”

“Pfft I JUST got here and I knew who this was about before she finished writing it… He always was my fav fuctard “

To the separatists that may be reading (yes, I do have a few), I want to congratulate you all on your newest edition.  I have sent you all a gift of extra filters, with him running around there, you all will have one hell of a time keeping up the gene pool…….Salud!

I am a huge fan of one being who they truly are, no more, no less and if one feels the need to totally reinvent oneself for the sake of a relationship, for goodness sakes, read the instructions first.

You know, since I’ve been single, I have been playing the dating game and not playing well apparently.  Then I stopped and re-read, comments and things from my readers and I think a bunch of us have been so knocked around that we should be lined up in the dented and ding section at Sears.

Of all the baggage that I think we carry around, the dysfunction that I think we drag from relationship to relationship the most is distrust.  It’s easy to decide that people are shit but it’s not so easy to let our guard down and allow them to become sugar again.  It’s like you meet someone you totally click with and instead of being totally excited at first, the feelings inside are more like

I can attest to the fact that letting that guard down is one on the hardest things to do.  I don’t just have guards, I have stone walls, moats, drawbridges and the like…lol, getting in with me is almost list breaching the castle in the Prince Caspian movie….LOL.  Still, as in the movie, it is possible to get in.  Most people who have had their emotional foundations shaken in bad relationships develop those barriers but even so, we  are aware that in order to move on, we have to be willing to drop the bridge so to speak and invite someone in our fortress.  But when?

What is it that decides we are ready to let our guard down and try this madness again??  Is it the person?  Time?  Gut feeling?  I think it can be any of the three.  I believe so strongly that the right person can walk into our lives and stir up the feelings that we have been protecting behind those, what we wanted to be, impenetrable walls.  They stir up the feelings of trust, compassion, passion, desire, need to love and the need to be loved.  The biggest feeling that is awakened is our feeling of vulnerability.  I know that I can deal with almost anything but the feeling vulnerability throws me for a loop.  Why?  Because that means, my guard is or is on it’s way down and whoever I’m letting it down for can hurt me.  I’m like most people, not a huge fan of that.  The funny thing is, it’s easy for us to say that when we’re vulnerable, someone can hurt us but the flip side is that when we’re feeling vulnerable, someone can love us and help us to feel more emotionally safe.

Some people require time but if we start planning our emotions based on time we can schedule in our blackberry then we have become entirely too regimented or we have become entirely too regimented.    We can’t plan when to start trusting people in the Captain’s log but we can use the log to document when started to feel the joy and relief of letting someone in.

Where we get screwed up a LOT is we don’t trust our gut.  Our instinct is something we’re born with for a reason.  It’s been my experience that some of the biggest dating and non dating problems that I’ve had in my life didn’t stem from my intuition being wrong, they came from me ignoring my physical cues.  I think that many of us are guilty of “giving people a shot” per se.  How many people have you gone out with and you had the attitude “Meh, we’ll see what happens, this might work out” versus “Wow, the chemistry with this person is awesome, this is going to be a lot of fun”?  I know I have, I think we may have all had the urge to settle even though we don’t have to.  I think that if we trust our gut and let our guard down, we might be making a more accurate decision.

Sure, there is always the possibility of getting hurt no matter when we drop that guard but the other opportunity is there also for happiness, no guts, no glory………right?

So how do YOU decide it’s time to start lowering your guard with new people you date?

I couldn’t resist the title, I’m really not calling anyone a dummy but the thought came to me, I laughed so it stayed.

The other day, I wrote a blog The Independent Woman & The Sensitive Male Ego .  Well during the discussion, I posted a list of random things that I expected from a partner and also what expected to lend to the relationship.  Following that post, I received a letter and it read:

“I think the points that you responded to my comment with should just be the beginning of a new discussion.  Each point could be a conversation in and of itself, and I think such a convo is needed to help us Men figure out What the Heck we’re doing wrong!  lol

‘How to Date an Independent Woman’

Whenever you get time, go for it!”

Now, if the writer of that letter wants to be known but you know I don’t ALWAYS put it all out there.  I thought it was a great idea so I took the short, following questions and posted it on my blog on Fubar as well as sending it to some for REAL “independent women” to see how they responded.  Here is what I sent out:

“Okay based on a comment on my blog about independent women, I’ve been asked to write a blog about how to date an independent woman.  What I get myself into…lol, if you have a chance, PLEASE answer these questions so I can put this all together and not base the whole blog on just how I feel.

1.  Do you expect your date/partner to open doors for you?
2.  Do you expect your date/partner to pull out your chair for you
3.  Do you expect your date/partner to place your order with the waiter/waitress for you?
4.  Do you expect your date/partner to pay if HE asks YOU out on the first date?
5.  Do you expect your date/partner to pay if YOU ask HIM out on the first date?
6.  Who pays if it’s just a “meeting” and we’re hanging out?
7.  Do you expect your date/partner to hold your purse in the store as you shop?
8.  Do you expect your date/partner to carry your packages as you shop?  Under what condition if it’s not all the time?

Now the long term relationship stuff

1.  Do you expect your partner to consult you prior to making a major purchase?  Are you willing to consult him before doing the same?
2.  Do you expect your partner to retain a bank account in his name, you one in yours and the two of you have a joint account?
3.  Do you expect for your partner to have his own vehicle?
4.  Who is responsible for doing laundry?
4.  Who is responsible for cooking?
5.  Who is responsible for cleaning?
6.  Who is responsible for taking out the trash?
7.  Who is responsible for the paying of the household bills?
8.  Who picks up the check for “date night” if you are in a long term monogamous relationship?
9.  Did I leave anything out??  Have anything to add?  Go for it.”

I was a little discouraged when the 1st comment I received on the Fubar blog was from a guy and it said:

“I don’t expect her to swallow on the first date. That would make her a slut.”

Ugh.  For a second, I thought that if this is who I was trying to point in the right direction regarding dealing with an independent woman then I’m getting ready to throw good keystroke after bad.  Then it dawned on me, if he couldn’t even get the basic point of what I was trying to do, then he’s NOT who I’m talking to and he’s better left to whatever class of women he’s dealing with.

So I moved on to the email responses that I got.  Reminding you that I cannot speak for the world only the information I have access to, so here we go.

There are TWO types of independent women.  The first group are the independent women who are so because they have no CHOICE.  The second is the independent woman who is okay being the independent woman and wants a partner and not an investor.

The independent woman who lands in that role due to circumstances but would much rather assume all of the traditional roles are the ones that a lot of men run into.  This is the woman who is quick to claim that she is independent and will do what she wants to do but yet, still expects for her man to totally support her when she’s in a relationship.

That woman is independent out of “need”.  That means when she’s single, she “needs” to pay her own shit but it’s not her preference.  She wants a lap dog, she doesn’t want to lose face and bow down and say that she’s willing to sell her independence to the highest bidder so she ends up in quandary many times because she wants to flex and talk about what she is and isn’t going to do and what HE can and cannot do.  I have a news flash for that woman.  if he’s payin YOUR bills, he pays the cost to be the boss.  If you want to allow yourself to become a financial dependent then you do it all, as the song says “Ain’t no half steppin”.

There is NO way to claim that you are independent when he’s paying YOUR bills and you use YOUR income to go shopping, to get your hair and nails done and if you have a child, using your money to take care of your child.  YOU have an investor.  Just like a major corporation, if he asks you to report then you report.  His money is out there on the necessities, don’t poke your lips out because he wants to make sure his shit is being managed properly.  That’s what companies have to do with investors on a regular basis, they are called quarterly reports….lmfao!

Next, you have the real deal Holyfield of the independent woman.  This woman manages her own finances, home family and doesn’t see the need for that to totally change.  On the real, there are fewer of this type than the “fair weather independent woman” that I described above.

This type of woman is not looking for someone to financially support her.  She’s almost afraid of that kind of situation because she’s aware that if he’s supporting her then she very well may end up in an obligatory relationship versus the partnership she really wants.  This woman still expects to be treated like a lady in public, she wants her chair pulled out, doors opened for her and so on but does that mean she’s not independent?  Not by a long shot, that just means the woman has some home training.

I like to look at the menu, decide what I want, tell my date and let him place the whole order.  There is NOTHING wrong with that but while shopping, I don’t expect him to hold my purse or carry my packages unless something is too heavy.  I’d like him to offer but most times, I got it.

Oh and all that seat pulling out and stuff, an independent woman doesn’t mnd giving her man a backrub or tend to some of the other things he likes his woman to do.

Now lets get down to what a lot of people talk about when it comes to independance and that’s finances.  Long story short, it was the consensus that it was okay for each party to have their own accounts in additon to a joint account for bills and other household expenses.  I even talked to a guy who used to have a vacation account set up and he and his girl used to put a certain amount of money in it each month so they could take an annual vacation.

Next, most of the women I talked to wanted to at least be considered when major purchases were being made, even if it was going to come out of his personal account.  Why?  Because there is always the possiblity that the maintenance for that large purchase is going to become a household expense.  Like if HE buys a car then later THEY end up paying for insurance.  On the flip side, she’s willing to do that same, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.

The way I have seen this get misconstrued though is that many men believe that if they talk to their woman first that they are asking for permission.  That’s not it.  It’s about communicating and staying on the same page.  It’s all very simple, a person can ask themself “am I getting ready to do something I would NOT want my partner to do?”

Dating is pretty much the way I laid it out, if HE asks HER on the first date then he pays, SHE asks HIM then she pays and if it’s a mutual “meeting” and they are hanging out, it’s dutch.  During the relationship, they can take turns paying or if there is some extra in a joint account they can take each other out….LOL.  Oh and those pesky house chores?  She is MORE than happy to split them down the center.

The REAL independent woman has established her identity and is not willing to let that go and just become “his girl”.  When she’s lost her identity in a relationship and people don’t even call her by name anymore, she’s referred to “his girl” a man can start expecting problems.  She’s going to try and figure out at what point she has enmeshed her identity into a relationship that no longer acknowledges her as a person.

The magic key to dating a REAL independent woman is for a man to be willing to not have the lead 24/7 and him being willing to have a total partnership.  To NOT be butthurt when she doesn’t agree with him or always think he’s right but is willing to find a happy medium.  This works out well for men too because a truly independent woman is NOT smothering.  She’s got her interests and is perfectly happy having a man who has some interests different from hers……..as long as those interests are NOT other women…LOL!!  She digs that because it really gives them something to talk about.

I don’t know if this helps but I think it’s a great start and if you are one of those “conveniently” independent chicks, please present your identification as such, you’re making it hard on those of us who really live the life and not just fake the funk.

Original Post 9/1/09

Senior deputy King County prosecutor James Konat, who went on leave last summer after having his hands slapped by the Supreme Court for using racially charged language during a murder trial in 2007.

In June, the Supreme Court affirmed that Konat had indeed engaged in “prosecutorial misconducts” during his line of questioning of black witnesses during a 2007 murder trial.

During his line of questioning black witnesses, Konat had often referred to the police as the “PO-lees”.  In the course of the trial, Konat questioned the black witnesses about a “code” that existed in predominately black neighborhoods that kept potential witnesses from talking to police during the original investigation of then murder suspect Kevin L. Monday Jr. who was subsequently convicted of first-degree murder and first-degree assault. Monday was subsequently sentenced to 64 years in prison.

During his closing arguments, Konat said that despite the denial of such a code by witnesses, Konat said that “the code is that black folk don’t testify against black folk.  You don’t snitch to the police.”

The Supreme Court found Konat’s remarks unacceptable and a complaint has been filed with the bar association.  But was Konat truly wrong in his statements?

In 2004, a very public campaign was launched in urban neighborhoods known as the ”Stop Snitchin” campaign.  The campaign was complete with t-shirts, bumper stickers and signs with slogas such as “snitches get stitches”, “snitches sleep in ditches”, “snitches are bitches who get stitches and end up in ditches” and “snitches get stiches and end up in ditches”.

The campaign was no secret; it received coverage in such publications as (USA Today) and other mainstream media.  So, I am forced to ask, was Konar really so out of line that he deserves to be sanctioned by the Supreme Court and a hearing in front of the bar association or was he simply pointing out something that most people knew anyway?

Source Article

The state of Massachusetts is preparing to implement legislation to help curb prostitution and online hookers are hopping mad.

The new human trafficking law that goes into effect on February 17^th, 2012 is targeted towards reducing the prostitution of juveniles by hitting those who patronize hookers (Johns) with fines up to $5000 and up to 21/2 years in prison.

The new law specifically designed to put the heat on the Johns and the pimps have made online hookers angry, many of whom are self-employed and do not consider themselves victims of human trafficking and believe that the new law will significantly reduce their income.

Attorney General Martha Coakley, a proponent for the law, tells the Boston Herald “The penalties we’ve had have been far too low” and “All we’ve done by the increases make them appropriate for the kinds of offenses we are talking about.”

The law signed in November provides a much stiffer penalty for those who are convicted of trafficking juveniles.  Instead of the $5,000 fine that can be assessed to the Johns, those who are convicted of trafficking juveniles can receive 2 ½ years in jail and fines up to $25,000.

The theory behind the new law is that by penalizing those who traffic women or those who patronize prostitutes, reduces the clientele for the prostitutes thereby reducing prostitution as a whole in the state of Massachusetts.

One prostitute that was interviewed by the Boston Herald says that the new law will have a greater impact on those who work at the street level and will not hurt her business as much as it may others because she has a steady clientele.  She further goes on to say that many of the men who patronize “high end” prostitutes do not usually do business with those who they don’t know and are often referred to prostitutes by other prostitutes in the industry.

Senator Mark C. Montigny (D-New Bedford), the law’s chief sponsor says that prostitution is not a victimless crime and that once one is trapped  into human trafficking or enslavement are not free to leave the industry and are working against their will.  Furthermore, minors under the age of 18 who are arrested on a first offense will be protected under a safe-harbor clause, allowing them to avoid penalties.

I think that tougher laws regarding the prostitution of minors are necessary as the human trafficking industry is rapidly growing.  I do, however, think that women who choose to voluntarily prostitute themselves as a way to make a living should be allowed to do so under government legislation.  I think that if the prostitution industry is regulated, those who participate should be subject to mandatory STD testing and their income subject to the same rate of taxation that is mandated for other contractors that are considered 1099 contractors.

Until that happens, I think that it takes a lot of nerve for prostitutes to complain about the loss of revenue in an industry where their actions are considered illegal in every state but Nevada.  I will be outdone the first time a prostitute sues the state for loss of revenue due to the new legislation.

Source Article

With all of the recent publicity surrounding the current state of public schools in major cities, I have been meaning to write this piece for the last few weeks but just keep getting sidetracked.  I am not one to jump on just any old bandwagon that passes my door nor am I a devout conspiracy theorist but recently I have heard and read up on some information that is, without a doubt, food for serious thought.

Some countries used to decide what occupation a person would enter by using a standardized test.  What you scored on that test would determine what occupation a person was going to do to earn a living.  If a person scored high enough, they would be allowed to receive higher education and enter into a professional arena.  If they scores were not high enough then the test taker would be remanded to a life of manual labor.  I am beginning to think that we are doing something very similar in the U.S. but using a different method.

28 states have passed legislation to allow for the existence of privatized prisons.  Those are prisons that are not state owned or state funded per se however they are allowed to bill the state or federal government for the care of the inmates.  Many of these corporations are now planning how many more prisons they will need to build based on 3rd and 4th grade reading scores as there has been a direct link established between lack of education and the crime rate.  Most inmates do not possess a high school diploma upon their entry into the penal system.

That said, I think that there is a weeding out process taking place in the public school systems in most cities.  Classrooms are overcrowded, students are exhibiting negative and sometimes dangerous behaviors and many public schools have cut funding for advanced placement programs to try and meet the educational need.  This weeding out process allows for some children to be voluntarily bussed to suburban schools to receive an education.  For those children who are not bussed but show some sign of academic promise, there is the opportunity for them to test and then be placed in a lottery system to attend a magnet or charter school.  Some of the magnet and charter schools are funded by the public school systems and some are private.  Along with the students that are going to the magnet or charter schools, so are some of the best teachers.  They are going to the magnet and charter schools because the class sizes are smaller and they are less dangerous.  Many of the teachers who have transferred believe that it gives them a better opportunity to educate.  Finally there is the option of attending a parochial school, there are scholarships available for those whose families cannot afford tuition.

Now, lets step back and take a look at this, you start with a school system that has good teachers and educable students, start taking the “best” of the students and the teachers and filter them out, leaving the “rest” in the pubic school system.  Many of those who are left eventually drop out and end up where…you guessed it, in prison.

It’s a known fact that slave labor was used in the U.S. because it was inexpensive.  When that was no longer legal, many businesses and corporations began using inexpensive immigrant labor or shipping their industrial work to countries where workers get paid pennies on the dollar and the company can still receive tax incentives.  Enter the prison systems, public and private.  The average inmate makes approximately $15.00 every two weeks working a job at the prison during their incarceration, that’s $30.00 per month to manufacture goods that are then resold by large companies.

Some companies that benefit from the use of prison labor include Chevron, IBM, Victoria’s Secret, Texas Instruments, Honeywell and Motorola.  The federal prison system trades under the name Unicor but the private prisons stand to benefit the most from inmate labor because they get first crack at the contracts since they have to raise most of their operating costs on their own.

In my opinion, we have managed to create a new type of “involuntary servitude” or “slavery” if you will.  Most of the immigrants and overseas employees are making more than thirty dollars a month so it’s actually less expensive for those companies to contract with prisons to make their goods.  I think that the “system” has found a way to isolate those who are the most “at risk”, under-serve them by “educating” them in crowded classes, sub par building conditions with ill equipped teachers with the hopes that the data remains correct, those who do not complete high school are more likely to transition into the prison system.

I completely understand that committing a crime and going to prison is a choice that’s made by a person but face it, many kids are raising themselves, baited by the temptation of “fast money” and in some other cases, trying to help support the family.  Those are not always the case with someone who is doing time but the reality still exists big business stands to profit in a big way on the backs of undereducated people, especially minority men.

I can’t say that if was not for inmate labor that those jobs would be available to the American worker because it’s obvious that big business will find cheap labor but I do struggle with the idea that certain groups are singled out to self distruct.  It’s almost seems as if a family is not able to get their child into one of the funnels that takes them into an alternative school setting that those children end up in a whole different funnel and that funnel leads to $30.00 per month.  Hence all of the lobbying that states and large corporations do to ensure access to privatized prisons.

So, what say you?  Do you think that disallowing big business to partake in the benefits of inmate labor further put our “at risk” youth more at risk than they started out or are some of these links sheer coincidence?  Second question is, would big businesses be as motivated to USE inmate labor if they had to relinquish a percentage of their profit and donate it to the local public school systems?

If you want to read more about this, I found a really good article on the use of prison labor and the economic impact it has on society.  Prison Labor Cheats Society

Originally Posted 9/28/09

I know there is that book that “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus” but the reality is that is so inaccurate.  The title of that book assumes that men and women are from the same solar system.  That is so incorrect.  Men and women tend to do things much more differently including, not limited to but especially communicate.

We women have a code that is not hard to figure out.  If it’s a daily chat about current events, then it’s a talk.  If it pertains to something bothering is, then it’s a conversation.  If it’s an exchange with our significant other about something we think they’ve done wrong, then its a discussion.  Finally, when we are convinced that we need to have a banter and things are going to go the way we are getting ready to dictate, then it’s a TALK.  I know that I used “talk” twice but you have to understand the inflection.  The one in all lower case is a casual dialogue, the one in all caps is the one that most men try to avoid.

Men, they do things a whole different way.  If it’s a chat with a woman about current events it’s the opportunity for them to nod their head, hope we get to the point so they can go back to what it is they would really rather be doing.  If it pertains to something that is bothering them it’s their problem and would rather figure it out themselves and wish we would just shut the fuck up and quit asking so damned many questions.  If it’s that exchange with their significant other about something that they are sure is going to end up being their fault no matter what they say or how they try to defend their thoughts or actions, it’s time wasted because they think they already know the outcome. Finally, if it’s that conversation where they think their woman is getting ready to dictate some shit, it then becomes a conversation with their boyz about how we are not runnin shit but our mouths and that he’s grown and will do as he pleases.  See how that works?

Guys, there is no way around the obvious, we women want to have a verbal exchange about EVERYTHING.  Period.  Nothing is a simple yes or no, everything has to have an explanation, reason or excuse none of which can be achieved without talking about whatever it is.  If you come home from a long day at work and announce that you need to run to the store, it would seem that we should just say okay and let that be that.  No such luck, we are, without a doubt going to want to know why you didn’t go to the store on your way home.  If you called on your way home and said that you needed to stop by the store then we are going to want to know why you didn’t tell us what you wanted from the store when WE went to the store the day before.  See?  Everything is a conversation.  It’s not just because we want to be nosy, although that is a huge part of it but what we are actually trying to figure out is why don’t you all do things the way WE would have done them.  As much as we talk, you’d think we would just ask you all that question directly but then that would require you all to give us an answer and the reality is we can’t hear your shoulders shrug and we kind of know that’s the answer we are going to get.

A man can come home after a long hard day at work and say “Damn, I’ve had a long ass day”.  I think men would like it much more if we said “Aww baby, I’m sorry to hear that” then do something nice for him to make him glad he’s home.  Nope, that’s too much like right, we want to know WHY his day was so long and hard.  That’s right, women insist that you live that long hard day twice, once in real time and the second in the play by play we want when you get home.  Why do we do that?  Because we ASSUME you all are thinking like us and want to talk bout it……most of the time it does not cross our mind that your day has been long and hard and you just want it over, we’re sure that you want to process out your day just like we do.  I know, we’re wrong again.
One of my favorites is when a guy is outside working on his vehicle or something else mechanical that we may know nothing about.  He can be outside cussin up a blue streak because the fix is not nearly as easy as he thought it would be.  More often than not, we approach him and his project empty handed with the million dollar question “Baby, what’s wrong with it?”  That leads him through this long ass mechanical explanation that inevitably ends with us asking “Can you fix it?”  Common sense would tell us that if it were that simple, it would be fixed already or damned close and he wouldn’t be cussin.  If he has to say “no” then we’ve just pissed him off by making him admit that he’s been working on something all day that he can’t do shit about.  Trust me ladies, he really appreciates that.  

Men typically don’t like to discuss their financial troubles with us either.  Why?  Well, I think it’s the same reason that my dad didn’t like discussing financial issues with my mom, after he went through all of that explaining, she wasn’t going to offer to get in her pocket so he thought it was pretty much a waste of time  .

The biggie is when it comes to discussing relationship issues.  We women LOVE to talk about what the current relationship status is, where it’s heading, how long we’ve been headed that way, what each of can do to make the trip more pleasurable and why we’ve not been able to get where were going in a lot less time than it’s taking us to get there.  Every day.  Ladies, the guys dig us, they really do but more often than not, they are not going to analyze our relationship the way we do they do it a little more like this…if they meet a woman, go out, she kisses him he knows she likes him.  He doesn’t need to talk about that.  If they have been dating a while, they have sex, he likes her and the sex is good and he says something like “you know that pussy’s mine right? Don’t be givin that shit to anyone else”, then he’s established that you’re exclusive.  When you get pissed at him and quit givin him the pussy, he knows there is a problem, when he starts gettin the pussy again, he knows the problem has been solved….lmmfao.  See how that works??

So what’s the fix??  The reality is there isn’t one really.  It’s been my personal experience that women and men really can discuss their problems but we need to just use fewer words.  I don’t say that to insinuate that men are remedial or dumb, that’s not it, they really just don’t wanna hear a lot of unnecessary words.  It’s been my experience that they want us to just get to the damned point.  Kind of like we were taught in school, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line….we women seem to like to take the scenic route.  All the time…ha ha

I feel totally justified in putting it all out there like that because I am guilty as the day is long….so, guys tell me, do you think we women talk too much most of the time??  Ladies, can you admit that we talk too damned much??  I can lmmfao!!

Original Blog Post 9/25/2009

I got a letter today (I seem to be getting a lot of those lately and I love it) and in the course of the text, the young lady who wrote me said something that I believe wholeheartedly and that is not all bloggers are writers. I am by no means anything “perfect” or even close to it, but what I am is a blogger (I like to think I fall into that writer category) that is allowed my own pet peeves and since this is MY blog , I can sound out about those and people are free to disagree with me…..lol, actually, it’s encouraged.  So here are some of the types of bloggers that annoy me to no end:

1.  Bloggers who use their blogs to foster their self esteem.  Those bloggers take a high and mighty opinion on a subject for the sole purpose of their readers to come through and tell them how wonderful they are.  Those bloggers seldom like for others to disagree with them and not only do they not like it but they get down right offended by it.  My personal feeling is that if you don’t expect for someone to have a contradictory opinion, then set that shit for that group of sheeple who co-sign anything and go for it.  Be reminded that if you set your blog public that not everyone is going to see your point of view.  You don’t have to agree but the least have the candor to respect alternative opinions.

2.  Bloggers who have no creativity but simply rewrite someone elses blog or in some cases, copy it verbatim and not give the original author credit.  There used to be this chick that would take my blogs and repost them on her blog spot on a regular basis and then complain that she wasn’t getting any comments.  Well hell no!  Since she usually boosted my shit the same day I wrote it and we shared readers, they had already commented on mine and felt no need to say all that shit over again.  Copying someone’s writing word for word is actually called plagiarism, which if one tries that shit in school would get them accused of cheating.  If you want to copy someone else’s blog, have the common courtesy to ask their permission.  Writing is a creative work and just like music or art, should not be boosted without props being given to the original creator.

3.  Bloggers who only write blogs for the sole purpose of offending other people because the blogger has some pent up aggression and just wants to fight with folks.  Now in those situations, I don’t know who pisses me off more, the negativity of the bloggers who do that or the simple fuckin folks who feel the need to cosign that bullshit.  I think in these situation, people cosign because they don’t want to get talked about.  For the love of goodness, grow a pair.  If someone is talkin shit then have the nuts to tell them you think so.  Again, it’s a public blog and having an independent thought should not be as uncommon as it is.

4.  Bloggers who have NOTHING to blog about other than dick and pussy.  Face it, dick and pussy, you can fuck em, suck em, play with em, beat em up, turn em out, whatever but damn how many ways can ONE person repeat themselves on how to do any of it.  In all honesty, there are people I used to enjoy reading then they got off on that track and I stopped because I feel like I’m reading the same shit just in different order.  Unless something is genetically wrong or surgically altered, we all have one or the other and they may vary in size and shape but on the real there’s not all that much difference.

5.  Bloggers who blog like they have never taken an English class in their LIFE!  I have an occasional typo or misspelled word, shit happens but I’ve read some shit by people who appear to not know that a sentence begins with a capital letter, ends in some sort of punctuation and have a few things called paragraphs.  Many times, I see those and keep it movin unless it’s a topic I feel like decoding.  Don’t write that shit in kindergarten code, there is almost nothing worse than glancing at a page full, run on sentence, full of smileys that makes absolutely no fuckin sense.  Many times our readers are friends and don’t want to hurt your feelings so they won’t tell you, I’m here to tell some of you grammatical tragedies that if you write a full page of that ridiculous shit and all of your comments just say “great post” or “good job”, you can feel assured that just like I don’t read that shit, they didn’t either, they are just being supportive.  There are two ways to get around that, spellcheck and Dictionary.com

I KNOW that everyone has their own blog spot and can do with it as they please.  They can write what they want, how they want, when they want and to whomever they please but I don’t mind telling folks, if you want to foster a REAL discussion on a topic, you might want to consider some of my peeves.  They are not just mine, others feel the same way because I’ve heard the feedback.

There is no such thing as the perfect blog, the perfect blog is one that the blogger is happy with, just like I’m perfectly content to let people know what I think suck ass about those who consider themselves to be blogger extraordinaires.

IN MY OPINION…..TO ME…ON MY BLOG PAGE, a successful blog has nothing to do with where it ranks.  A successful blog is about writing something on which people enjoy having an intelligent discussion, feeling safe enough to express those feelings without fear of being flamed and most of all, feel like I’ve said something worth hearing.  You did notice I said “IN MY OPINION”, right?……LOL

What say you?  What are things that a blogger does that makes you decide that you don’t want to read them or participate in the discussions?

Original Blog Post 9/4/2009

A few blogs ago, I wrote about how the lines have gotten skewed between the modern independent woman and the traditional roles that women expect when it comes to dating and the two really don’t mix.  The general consensus in that blog from the men was that if a woman is going to be independent then she need to be so all the time and hold her own equally on a date.  That kind of sums up the outcome of that blog although that was the consensus that was not the opinion for all men.

After I wrote that blog, I got an email from a friend of mine that I respect.  He wrote me and told me that it may be harder for me to find a compatible partner because I am financially responsible, maintain my own responsibilities and with as many jokes as I make about women and their toys it’s possible that I am SO independent that a man may either feel insecure or feel like he may not really have a place in my life other than being an accessory.

Building on that a little bit, I was doing some reading about how some of the traditional male roles still linger within men.  According to what I read, being able to provide for a woman financially, emotionally and sexually are three major components to what most men feel that men are supposed to do and are directly related to his masculinity.  Basically, if he can’t do those things than he feels less than a man and that a woman has assumed the “male role” in the relationship.  Now ladies, don’t get that twisted, it does not mean that a man feels inadequate if he’s not paying your rent or car note, trust me, he’s cool on not having to do all that, he’s no sucker…okay?  It’s kind of like this joke I heard the other day, a woman wants a man to wear the pants in the family but she also wants to lay out the ones he puts on….LOL.

A man’s ego is a lot more sensitive than he may let on, the male “machismo” doesn’t allow for a man to communicate that he’s feeling inadequate and emasculated by the relationship.

At first I kind of kicked back and called “bullshit” on all that.  Then I looked around an my friends and myself and I really saw some similarities.  We are all intelligent, easy on the eye, independent and yup………single.  If you smelled smoke, you’re probably right, I started thinking again.  Maybe there is something to this being overly independent…….. does it make finding a suitable partner harder?  I think it very well might.  It’s been my personal experience that a lot of my exes have moved on to women who require a bit more maintenance than I do and I don’t mean the hair and nails thing.

I have always stood by the fact that the ideal person for me would understand and embrace a partnership but asking some men to go from the mindset of the being the head of household to a “partnership” still may not be enough to satisfy what he may see as his “manly” responsibilities.

So here are my questions:

1.  Can a woman be so independent that she “independents” herself out of the market?

2.  Can there be a balance reached between the “independent woman” and her man where she doesn’t have to give up or lose sight of who she is and still foster his ego and his need to play the traditional male role by choosing and wearing the pants in the relationship?

Original Blog Posted  8/28/2009